World-class amenities.

WC. Food. Ice Cream. Camel.

What more could I ask for?

Prehistoric pot.

The ancient Greeks had it all, over 2,500 years ago.

But was I doing this horribly wrong? Were the archaic sitters really squatters?

In any case, it must've been great to do your business where all your buddies could see.

Way, way worse.

Now... it could have been dirtier and smellier. And at least I wasn't flanked on each side by squatting, grunting old men like in Belgrade. I did have my privacy. I'll give them that.

The worst part was the flush. Use the red contraption under the faucet. Wash it away... wash it all away, out of sight.

There. Don't you feel better now?

Way better than us.

In an ultra-modern shopping mall in İstanbul, we find the cinema of all cinemas. Well, I didn't actually see a film here but I did use their bathroom. And if the theater is anything like the pisser, it's pretty f'ing sweet.

They've even got little monitors in every stall.


But what gives?!?! How the hell am I supposed to watch this screen? It's behind my head! Hmmm, maybe some reverse squat, side-saddle technique. Damn these cultural differences.

Oh those Turks! They've thought of everything. BAM! Mirrors on the back of the door.